A healthy sex life doesn’t age, and neither do STBBIs

In the last decade, sexually transmitted and blood-borne infections (STBBIs) have been on the rise among people aged 50 and over. According to the Institut national de santé publique du Québec, chlamydia cases more than doubled and gonorrhea cases tripled in this age group between 2011 and 2021. If sexual desire diminishes with age, how do you explain the surge in STBBIs among those in this demographic?

Does aging slow down our sex drives?

There’s a common belief out there that people aged 50 and over no longer desire sex, perhaps due to the many changes that come with age. Erectile difficulties, menopause, vaginal dryness and atrophy, as well as the onset of certain motor limitations, can all inhibit sexual activity. However, many folks in this age group still desire sex and adapt their behaviours to these physical changes, such as expanding their definition of sex beyond penetrative sex or using helpful aids like lubricant or Viagra to overcome any challenges they may face.

Age-related asexuality is a prejudice that excludes people aged 50 and over from conversations around sexual health. Many doctors often forget to broach the subject of sexuality with their senior patients, and patients, on the other hand, sometimes won’t even ask questions about sex due to embarrassment or discomfort. Nevertheless, many people experience significant changes to their relationships at this stage of their lives—divorce, the death of a spouse—that lead to finding new partners and possible exposure to STBBIs. Ultimately, sex doesn’t slow down after the age of 50—and neither do STBBIs.

Obstacles to taking charge of our sexual health

Some people believe that STBBIs and STBBI screening don’t concern them.

However, STBBIs don’t discriminate—they can affect anyone! If you think you’re immune, that may be because you’ve heard some of these  common misconceptions: 

Myth 1: STBBIs are only transmitted during penetration. 

The reality is that STBBIs can also be transmitted during oral activities, by sharing sex toys and even unprotected stimulation using hands or fingers. 

Myth 2: No symptoms? No worries!

Unfortunately, most individuals with STBBIs won’t develop any symptoms, which means you can have an STBBI and pass it on without knowing. 

Myth 3: People with STBBIs have many partners. 

Although having multiple partners can put you at risk, it isn’t the only risk factor to consider. For example, if you’ve recently changed partners and decided to have sex without protection or getting tested, you could unknowingly be transmitting an STBBI.

Myth 4: People who insist on wearing protection or getting tested are hiding something.

Quite the opposite. These are protective measures intended to avoid getting an STBBI, not to avoid hiding one. Prioritizing screening or protection is a way of taking care of ourselves and others so we can better enjoy shared intimacy.

Myth 5: Only irresponsible people contract STBBIs. 

Anyone can contract an STI. When someone tells you that they have an STBBI, they’re taking responsibility for avoiding transmitting it to you while encouraging you to get tested so that you, in turn, can receive the care you may need.

Is it possible to reduce risk without reducing pleasure?

Don’t panic! There are effective ways to reduce risk without sacrificing your muy caliente moments.

Barrier protection methods

Just as their name suggests, barrier protection methods create a wall during sexual activity to limit the transmission of STBBIs. There are several options, depending on your sexual activities:

• Condoms for oral, anal, or vaginal penetration;
• A dental dam for stimulation of the vulva or anus with the mouth;
• Latex gloves or finger cots for hand or finger stimulation.
  

These methods are effective, but not always 100%, since they can be incorrectly placed or positioned. Some STBBIs—such as syphilis, HPV and herpes simplex virus (HSV)—can cause lesions that extend beyond the protected area. The key to enhancing safety is combining these methods with regular screenings and conversing with your partner. 

Regular screenings

Screening is a preventative method designed to detect and treat suspected (or unsuspected) STBBIs. We recommend getting screened even if you are asymptomatic if you find yourself in one of the following situations:

• You’re in a stable relationship and want to stop using protection;
• You don’t know the sexual health status of your past or present partners;
• You’ve changed partners.

If you don’t have access to a doctor, or if the thought of speaking to someone about a screening makes you feel anxious, you can always book an appointment with specialized screening resources like Prelib. Club Sexu has also designed a search tool as part of DépistaFest, Quebec’s annual STBBI screening festival, to help you find the clinic best suited to your needs. 

There’s strength in numbers… especially when it comes to sex 

Talking about STBBIs with your partner can feel awkward, but it’s *the* best way to come up with prevention strategies you can tackle as a team. After all, teamwork makes the dream work! 

You can start by emphasizing the importance of being transparent and caring for your health. Then, agree on protection methods that work for both of you and discuss your latest screening results. And hey, you can even make an appointment together—why not turn it into a fun date?